Ever wanted to go eat out at a restaurant but no one was around to go with; well go out by yourself instead. Sounds easier said then done because mentally you might be a little turned off to eating alone but let me tell you it is so amazing when you get to the point of feeling comfortable with eating alone.
Already comfortable with eating alone then great but if you’re not then keep reading because I was there once and I had a long journey to getting comfortable with eating alone.
First Solo Trip 2018
Prior to backpacking, my first solo trip was actually a week in Italy after a study abroad program. I wouldn’t consider this my real first backpacking experience as I just stayed in hotels and did not interact with anyone. Back then I never thought about hostel life and did not think I would ever do it. If I could go back I would erase that mind set.
While in Italy, I had this picture in my head of me enjoying a solo date; wine in hand and pasta in front of me. It was a way to romanticize my life but I never achieved it. I never did go to a restaurant during my time in Italy and eat alone. Instead, I always just got takeout and ate alone in my hotel room. No wine was every even drank an Italy.
Can you believe I didn’t drink wine in Italy!
Now my time in Italy was not bad; it was just something I was not able to achieve for myself. I was not yet comfortable in my alone and did not have the mental capabilities to sit and eat alone. I was thinking that people would judge me for eating alone; thought I looked pathetic. Looking back at that time I had to go through that to get where I am now.
Japan 2024
The first time going backpacking and two months in I went to Japan; which is not really a backpacking country so it is harder to meet people. I spent a lot of time eating alone in Japan; the difference here is I didn’t let that stop me from sitting and eating out. Here is where I started overcoming my poor insecure mindset.
I love Japanese food and I was not going to miss out on eating all the foods I wanted to. Almost every night I looked for a restaurant and ate alone. At first I felt awkward but I have learned things are only awkward if you make them. I had to get into my head that no one was looking at me eating and no one cared I was eating alone. Once that mindset settled in eating alone felt more comfortable.
Finally Feeling Comfortable
Here is the thing about Japan; its very common to find people eating alone so I was able to adjust my mindset because of this fact. Lots of restaurants accommodate solo customers. It was not until I ate alone in Indonesia that I really started feeling comfortable. When I ate out here I was surrounded by travelers in groups enjoying each others company and I sat alone but then I saw other solo travelers as well and thats when I realized
eating alone; the only one who cares is you!
I didn’t care that those people were eating alone why would they care I was eating alone; they didn’t. People are enjoying their own meals having their own conversation you are not important in their world so do what you want. Guess what if they judge you, you would never know anyways thats the beauty of being strangers; you can do whatever you want.
Now I have had countless sit down dinners at nice restaurants alone while traveling and its great. I am not missing out on any good eats and enjoying my alone time where all I have to entertain anyone but myself.
There is nothing wrong with treating yourself to a solo date night!
The Real Challenge
With all that being said I feel like my real challenge will be when I am back home. Will I be comfortable going out to eat in the city I live in? Will this mindset stay with me or will I cower away and conform to the familiarity of home? I am not yet sure but its a challenge I accept when I get back home.
