What I hope Traveling gives to me; A New Beginning

Openness to One’s Self

I tend to keep myself closed off. Never using my voice in conversation, sticking behind someone, or simply not leaving the comfort of my own home. I have missed opportunities and experiences just because I did not want to meet new people and wanted to stick to myself. In traveling I am forced to open myself up, especially as a solo traveler. There’s no way I can go months without speaking to someone; so I’ll have to use my voice, meet new people, give an opinion, and overall just not keep to myself. I hope traveling will encourage me to not hide but instead be open to people and new experiences because the world is only scary if you make it that way for yourself. And I’ve made it that way for a long time.

Goodbye Co-Dependency

I have claimed to be an independent woman when in reality I am so co-dependent its disgusting. When I was young I was very much codependent with parents and passed a certain age that is not good. Once I meet my boyfriend I became codependent with him. I isolated myself from everyone and wanted to remain in my own bubble with him; it became bad for me. I need to learn to be more dependent on myself not scared to be alone. To tell the truth my travels was supposed to be a couple not solo but now I have to go alone and thats not necessarily a bad thing I’m just gonna be learning a hard lesson on codependency; one I really need. I hope travel helps me to learn and embrace my independence. Its okay to be alone with oneself sometimes.

Accept What Can’t be Controlled

I am a control freak and I can admit it but when things don’t go my way I feel utterly defeated and this can destroy me. I can’t always handle when things don’t go as I want and it hurts my spirit; makes me feel like a failure and I can’t get back up or maybe I don’t want to. It is important to be fluid when traveling long term. Things do not always work out and I have kind of already seen that when I couldn’t make my first flight to start traveling.

I was so sad and defeated when I could not get on the plane when I was suppose to leave and it felt like everything was going wrong. However, I had to keep going and accept what I could not control. I changed my flight and prepared myself for the new date instead. This lesson I am sure I will encounter a lot and will have to relearn every time but hopeful it will become easier every time.

Overall, I hope travel helps me to grow and become the person I have always wanted to be.